Wow, two weeks apparently flies by, eh?  I’m back at home, getting caught up on laundry, emails, bills, and all the lovely things that come with “reality.”  I started writing this post on Monday and keep coming back to it, but haven’t really been able to articulate what my time away meant until today.

My two weeks away with the Turkey Land Cove Foundation were such a gift, personally and professionally.  I knew the experience would be wonderful as well as challenging, especially since I haven’t been away from my husband for more than a week at a time (and realized I’ve never been alone for more than a weekend).  I went with a purpose of designing an ambitious amount of work to prepare for the National Stationery Show – and hoped to be like a designing machine: getting struck by a creative lightning bolt and being able to churn out new product designs, a new wholesale catalog, show give-aways, and the like.  When I arrived, I didn’t even realize how burnt out I was from a week’s worth of bookkeeping, found myself creatively stuck in the mud at the beginning, and still dealing with personal issues at home while I was still there.  I also didn’t realize how much loneliness can affect your ability to do work, and at times I missed conversation and being able to hug my husband (or my cats!) so badly that it hurt.  However, I could feel that I was in a moment of huge personal growth and knew I was there for a reason.

Lately, I’ve approached my work like the way I approach my runs.  When it gets tough and you think you can’t keep going, you dig deep and you keep on running.  When work piles up and I think I can’t get it all done, I dig deep and put in long days and long hours and get it done.  I’ve assumed this is basically the only way to work.  However, I realized something important when I was there – that’s not always the right thing to do.  When you push yourself again and again, for months and months, to the point where you’re pretty depleted, it’s going to be difficult to get something worthwhile out of your head.  I arrived the first night in shock that there was this gorgeous home all to myself, and felt guilty for accepting it.  It took me two hours just to sit down in a chair.  Once I did, I got straight to work even though both my husband and the director of the program told me to take the first night to settle in.  But I felt guilty that I wasn’t “working” and I certainly wasn’t there to vacation – I was there to work!  But by the 2nd or 3rd day, I had a bit of a meltdown and after talking to my husband on the phone, he pointed out that I really needed to take a step back.  I was second guessing the work that I had already accomplished and wondering if any of my ideas where “good enough,” and he stopped me and made a really good point… When else are you going to have the opportunity to focus on being creative?  Just drawing, exploring, and seeing what comes of it?  Yes, you have to get a ton of work accomplished, but why not stop worrying and just focus on the quality of work instead of quantity?

The next day, I went out for a bike ride to a local market to pick up a few things.  I apparently went past the building I was looking for and way too far into town.  I felt like a tourist, silly in my helmet and awkward on a bicycle when I haven’t ridden one in almost 10 years, then had to walk back up to the top of a hill that I had just been flying down.  But I composed myself, went back to where I started, and realized the market I was looking for was closed for the winter season.  Ha!  The entire biking excursion seemed pointless… but it wasn’t.  Instead, I then decided to head out towards the ocean and when I got there, I was rewarded with a gorgeous sun low in the sky and the entire beach all to myself to enjoy.  When else do you get an entire Martha’s Vineyard beach all to yourself?  And why the heck I am telling this story?  Because I learned something about how I need to approach my work from now on.  By giving myself the chance to mess up and make a mistake, or to be able to step away from my work and enjoy a life experience – it actually allowed me to do more work.  It helped to clear the creative road block and the self doubt that I started my retreat with, and I was then more productive.  Yes, you always have to dig deep when things get tough, but sometimes that’s not always the only approach – sometimes you have to stop and take a step back and remember you’re not a designing machine, you’re a person and you have to take care of yourself first in order to do good work.

That night and for the rest of my time there, I accomplished so much work.  It was like the creative lightning bolt finally struck.  My husband was right, and by not worrying so much about getting everything done, I was still able to get a lot of good work done.  When I needed feedback on my progress, I called or Skyped with good friends.  When I was too distracted, I shut off my cell phone.  I took the time to rest and do yoga everyday, but I also worked for hours and hours at a time and accomplished so much there than I would have at home.  When the end of my two weeks had finally happened, I had created a wonderful working rhythm and routine.  My biggest regret was not asking for three weeks away instead of two, but life happens and you can’t stay away for that long.  I feel so blessed to be given that experience, it was amazing and life changing, empowering, and encouraging.  To be alone with myself – completely alone for two weeks (I’m still in shock by it) and know what I’m made of and accomplish a lot makes me really happy and really proud.  I’ve had a tough time coming back down to reality this week, but I’ll find that flow again.  I’ve got a lot of work to accomplish in the next few months for NSS, and I’m really excited to see where all of my original ideas from my grant stay with the Turkey Land Cove Foundation go.

For any information about applying for the TLCF grant, please visit their website.  It was an incredible experience and I definitely encourage it if you can go!

{images shown are either from my Instagram or my camera}

I’m excited to share a secret I’ve kept for a few months while I was still applying: I was awarded acceptance into a grant program from Turkey Land Cove Foundation to spend two full weeks at their retreat house this February, less than a month away!  TLC offers a personal retreat for motivated women to pursue their professional, artistic and educational goals away from the distractions of daily life.  While I’m there, I’ll be designing and preparing for when I exhibit with Parrott Design Studio at the National Stationery Show in NYC this May.

I am very proud to be given this amazing opportunity from a wonderful non-profit that supports women with big goals.  Not sure yet if I’ll be blogging while I’m there, but I’ll definitely be keeping a journal and super busy getting lots of work done!

{image shown belongs to the Turkey Land Cove Foundation}

This past weekend in Brooklyn was a whirlwind of traveling, walking, eating, and the best – laughing.  My fantastic friend was an amazing hostess and showed me the best places to visit and we had the best time together.  I wish my weekends were more free and I could visit her more often!

{image shown from my Instagram feed @letterandlark}

Today is Monday, which for everyone can be a tough day to go back to work – but I can assure you that it’s even more difficult to try to get anything accomplished when you’re still daydreaming of the amazing vacation you just came back from.  New Hampshire with my family was a dream.  It sort of feels like we just woke up from this magical dream, and my husband and I were thinking, “Did it really happen?  It went by so fast!”

The house was incredibly gorgeous and everyone was able to relax and enjoy each other (without feeling, “oh my god, I’m with my entire family for a whole week in one house” – really, at all).  We ate wonderful food, explored the woods, rivers, lakes, and sights together, and just enjoyed being a family.  Played Uno, put together puzzles, played bowling on my brother-in-law’s XBox (which I can assure you is sure to please 4 generations of family!), and just hung out together.  It meant the world to me to see all my nephews running around the house playing together – it really reminded me my own childhood and spending time with my cousins (who are still some of my dearest, best friends to this day).  I got to swim for 5 days in a row (my husband could not get me out of the water!) and spent so much time just relaxing at the gorgeous house my parents treated all of us to.

I’m sitting here honestly trying to get work done, but I keep looking back at all of our photos and it’s becoming really difficult to do much of anything… too bad that I have a full work load this week!  I’m really hoping that we can do it all over again next year.

{images shown via my Instagram @letterandlark}

We got back from camping last night and it was an interesting trip to say the least!  Unfortunately the weather wasn’t the best and we dealt with down pouring rain, a tornado warning, hot and humid nights (the hottest, muggiest weather to try to sleep in), and even more rain.  However, most of Saturday was just partly cloudy with glimpses of the sun and we were able to enjoy the outdoors while we could.  Sunday was my 30th birthday (it still sounds so weird to say that!) and we met up with friends for afternoon tea, trying a new place I’ve never been to.  I was a memorable weekend and above all, so incredibly wonderful to spend 3 whole days with my love (we’re like two ships in the night lately with our schedules).

Unfortunately for my workload, I’m going away again this Saturday to spend a week up in the White Mountains with my entire family – it should be interesting with 10 adults, 3 kids and a baby all in one house!  So I’ll be blogging this week when I can (I have a lot of 2013 calendar printing to do!) but will be absent from this space all of next week.

{images shown are from my Instagram @letterandlark}

I was hoping this week would be the start of regular blogging again, but I promise I have a good excuse: I was visiting the National Stationery Show in NYC!  Got up at 5 am, drove to the city with Sarah, visited the show, attended the Stationery Meet-up, then drove all the way back home – got in just after 2 am last night.  Although I’m a bit exhausted today, it was so worth it.  I got to meet so many people whose work I’ve admired for years or have talked to only on blogs, instagram, or facebook – it’s was so nice to be able to meet people face-to-face and say hello in person.  It was a long Tuesday, but a great one!  Thanks, Sarah for being my co-pilot and NSS buddy!

{image shown via my Instagram @letterandlark}

I completely forgot to blog about this, but on a recent LGNE trip to Providence we were lucky to view the Daniel Berkeley Updike History of Printing Ephemera Collection at the Providence Public Library.  Here’s a few snapshots from our visit:

{images shown via my instagram @colleenellse}

Had the pleasure of visiting Angela Liguori of Carta, Inc. in her gorgeous studio this afternoon.  Her space is a dream!  Open, inspiring, and sure to be a creative place to work (I can’t get that wall color out of my head!) and I am dying to find any project/excuse to be able to buy her ribbon.  We have several connections between mutual friends and it was about time we said a proper hello in person.  Thanks for letting me drop by, Angela!

(Didn’t get a chance to photograph the studio, but here are some wonderful shots from Hillary Deane who visited Angela recently)

{images shown belong to Hillary Deane Photography}

This past Saturday was a real treat for me.  I recently joined LGNE and my first outing with the group was to The Printing Office of Edes & Gill, a 18th century working print shop.  Edes and Gill were the proprietors of The Boston Gazette and Country Journal, and The Boston Gazette became one of the most influential newspapers in colonial America.  The shop’s director and print master, Gary Gregory, was a wealth of printing knowledge (as well as knowing about Boston’s printing history). Edes & Gill has two presses, an antique wooden rolling press for intaglio and an English common press.  We were able to observe the printing process and print ourselves on the large English common press – what an experience!

The shop will be fully open in April and is located on the Freedom Trail, in the North End.  If you’re in the area, you definitely have to stop in and say hello.  Gary has invested so much love, time and money into the shop and it’s a wonderful experience for anyone interested in printing or in the history of Boston.

{for more of my outings & experiences photos, check out my Flickr}

This past weekend I stopped into Fancy That while they were having an open house.  Had to share these photos – they have such an amazing space and wonderful china.  If you’re in the area, you really should stop in!

{images shown via my iPhone – yes, I did download new Hipstamatic film this weekend and I love it!}